Festivus

Today was the Little Flower Festival!! We were excited about it as last year by fair time, the kids were into the rides. I bought the cheaper pre-sale ride tickets which gave the church more profit. We showed up when it opened to ride a little and eat some food before we saw Jungle John.

We ate and rode "the horses" (carosel) before Jungle John's show. The kids lasted through about 45 minutes of the animal show before they and their friend Emily wanted to get back to the rides. Upon examining the other rides, Veronica determined that they were too big for her and spent her day patiently watching Thomas on the rides, sticking to her responsibilties toward Baby Amy and her stroller, which she pushed over the whole way. Veronica is one dedicated little Mommy. She never complained or asked to leave, instead she proudly pushed Amy from ride to ride.

Thomas, on the other hand, could not get from one ride to the next fast enough. We finally bought him a ride-all-day wristband and used the pre-purchased tickets so we could ride with him on the bigger rides. He also was very serious about his responsibilties. He kept a studious look with every ride he was on. Only glancing up occasionally to look at us and sometimes smile. He loved the rides, and he loved thinking hard on them!

Once we decided to forgo the nap as they were both happy with our activities, Veronica decided to give the rides a try. She even rode the Strawberry - a tea-cup type ride and demanded that Daddy spin it "FASTER!" Once Veronica rode more rides, Thomas was a little more animated in the rides - sharing a smile with his sister.

Half Dozen

Four kids and six years ago today I married my best friend.



He's everything I never knew a person could find in a soul mate. He makes me sure that I feel I am the most important person in the world - not by telling me this, but by showing me daily through his actions. He makes me laugh. He holds me when I cry. He pats me on the back when I accomplish something. He makes me think. He teaches me new things. He makes me want to strive to do the same for him. He makes me feel so connected to him that I forget he wasn't a part of my life before 1999. He is what love is.

Seeing Double

We enjoyed a beautiful day in Noblesville with many sets of twins from our twins' club. It was GORGEOUS outside. The hostess's backyard was equipped with a playhouse, swing set and a bouncy-house... my kids - stuck inside playing in the playroom. I have to admit that it was a well-stocked playroom, but I wanted to be outside with the Mommies. It all evened out when some of the older girls came in to play dress-up. Veronica and Thomas were intrigued with this game and just soaked it in - even when it was determined that they were playing house and V&T were now the babies.

Below is a picture of the hostess's oldest daughter twirling in a princess dress.

Another Day with Pete & Danae

We had another exceptional evening hanging out with Pete and Danae. Thomas sang his new favorite song all the way there and back... Mr. Blue Skies by ELO. He even does his own falsetto, knows most of the words, and does the back-up ooo's and ah's.

Pete and Danae don't get that the kids are completely thrilled to see just them, so they have even more fun with the goodies they prepare. Tonight's specialties were bubbles, sidewalk chalk and chocolate chip cookies.

Above: Enjoying cookies while playing with suction cup/spring toys that bounce up after being stuck to the table - endless enjoyment!

The Calm in the Storm

I awoke to this conversation on the monitor:

V: It was scary at night and Mommy hold me.
T: Oh, that's good.

Last night was the first of the Mommy-save-me-I'm-scared-to-sleep nights. There was a big, bright, flashy, noisy storm. As the kids can't keep many things in one piece - including the window shade, the lightning seemed to bother Veronica. Thomas slept through it all. I went in to Veronica's complaints of "that scare me." I covered the window up with a dark sheet, but was summoned in later. I held her in the recliner and she went directly back to sleep. I miss that cuddling where they are so comfy they sleep on your chest. Ah, it was a peaceful storm.

Carnival

I had the privilege of being a part of the downtown, Redeemer MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group this school year. A bunch of fabulous women with kids Veronica and Thomas's age. It's been good for me to talk to some adults. We met twice a month - one meeting was usually a craft, the other informative, always with good food and great company. The kids have enjoyed Moppettes, the childcare. Last year, I had to spend most of my time with them in Moppettes. By the end of this year, however, they were excited to go. It's been great for all of us.

Today was the last meeting of the school year, so it combined moms and kids into a carnival. They got slushies, balloon animals, faces painted and played games. And I finally got to see the kids everyone talks about at these meetings!

Veronica fishing

Thomas and Kasey playing Twister

The Boy in the Boots

Thomas is quite proud of his rain boots. He insisted on wearing them today. I must admit, they do compliment his ensemble.

Memorial

Today is Memorial Day. For most of my childhood and into adulthood, I accompanied my grandmother to the cemetery every Memorial Day to put new flowers and grass seed on my grandfather's grave. It was always very special to me - an intimate time with my grandmother and the spirit of my grandfather.

When asked what Grandpa's job was during World War II, he would always say he drove a truck. I understand that he did not speak about the war much - mostly only reminiscing about passing out candy bars to children in France at the end of the war. It is rumored though, that his job was to drive the truck out to the battle fields to pick up casualties. I am sure Memorial Day was a very intense holiday for my grandfather.

I understand that over the years people have begun to misinterpret Memorial Day as a day to honor all dead. I do not fault these people as I understand how tragic it is to lose a loved one and that it is important to have traditions to honor these people. I do appreciate that many towns still hold Memorial Day services to specifically honor our fallen heroes - to keep true to the reason this is a national holiday.

I do, however, see another memorial in the middle of the spectrum. Those who have lost other battles: cancer, alcoholism, Lou Gehrig's disease, etc. With each casualty of these diseases, we understand more and come closer to winning the battle so others can survive their wars with these diseases.

In the same way, I honor (as I do everyday), the casualties of our own war. This war is personal to us, yet we sadly share it with many friends. Ours is the struggle to conceive... and the struggle to bring home a healthy baby. Our fallen heroes are Julianne and David... and their playmates in heaven. I was fortunate enough to fight along side them in this war to live. Judson and I gave all we could: our time, our money, our prayers, my body to a hospital bed, my veins to an IV, my organs to surgery... to try to win this battle for their lives. They gave us hope, heartbeats to hear, kicks to feel, and warm bodies to hold in their attempt to survive.

Rationally, I know that there is not much more I could have done. Emotionally - the side that clouds rational - I have too many what ifs, guilt, and feelings of failure. I was speaking to a friend who has been through a very similar experience. She mentioned how she still has feelings of panic about it and likened it to post-traumatic stress. I believe that PTSD is exactly what it is. I think this paragraph could describe the feelings of those soldiers who survived war, being forced to leave behind the casualties.

All is not lost in a lost battle. We gained two children that we can call our own, siblings for our children on earth. We gained knowledge for the next war. Our second war was longer than the first. Fourteen weeks of hospitalization, nine weeks on an IV, more worry due to experience, the lack of a carefree pregnancy, guilt over carrying on... However, thanks to the sacrifices of Julianne and David, we were able to win the battle and bring home Veronica and Thomas.

Thank you, my little angels, for the sacrifices you have made for our family.

Into the Woods

We discovered that my brothers, their wives and friends were all camping at the county park up the road from my parents' home. As Judson gave me a day out with Anita and Carolyn yesterday, I decided that a day at the park with my family was a good excuse to leave him to his own devices.

We packed up for a car nap on the trip. When we reached town, there was a lot of discussion in the back seat about some police cars that were seen. Then, I heard Thomas say, "That's too bad. That's just too bad, Sissy." The only reply I got when I asked what was too bad was a round of giggles from the two of them - laughing at a pair of sunglasses that fell off the console when I stopped the car. I guess whatever it was wasn't that bad.

There was a lot of excitement when we entered the park. "Look, Sissy! Trees!!!" "Big Trees!!!" "Wow!" "Oh, a forest!"

We were greeted at the campsite by tents. The twins were quite interested in the tour Thad & Paula gave them of the tent. Thomas's comment upon entering the tent: "This is a great idea!"

We had a little time to get acclimated and relax before our first trip into the woods.

Thomas walked onto the first path and said, "The woods. I love this!" Then, he took to being our trail guide. He talked through the entire trail. "This is a hill. We are going this way. Be careful!" After each water break back at the campsite, Thomas requested another walk in the woods. We took about 4 hikes. One ended with finding a frog that they played with for a long time.

Veronica requested to be carried for most of the hikes, but she liked them overall.

Merry-Go-Round & Mariachi

We were delighted that the Klueg's were able to swing into town for a long weekend.


So, we gathered up the usual suspects and dove into some fun!

We were jumping for joy that it was an open gym day at Gymnastics Unlimited.

Veronica spent most of the morning practicing her jump - and even looks like a pro with her knee-bending now!

All that activity made for some great appetites, so we headed to a near-by park for a picnic.

We had a rock concert.

...but one of today's greatest hits was the merry-go-round. You don't see those at playgrounds much anymore!

We had lots of laughs.

Evalyn read all our minds and beat us to the next group activity...

We regrouped and met at a Mexican restaurant.

For some Mariachi entertainment! Dinner was followed by five toddlers dancing.

for more pictures from today, click here

Emma

These are my three great-nieces. Yes, GREAT-nieces. That makes my friend, Amy, my niece and Veronica and Thomas her cousin. The third of these beautiful girls, Emma, was born this morning around 4:30. Everyone appears to be doing well.

I put this as the desktop picture on the computer to introduce her to Veronica and Thomas. They've been anxious to meet her everytime we talked about Amy's belly. I'd barely had time to explan that Emma had been born when Veronica insisted, "Let's go see her!"

We do hope to meet you soon, little Emma!!

Following the Leader

The last couple days I've seen a certain twin tagging along - imitating the other... both of them!

Yesterday there was a lot of give-and-take, so it was harder to tell. For instance, we were at a school playground. One would choose which way to go up to the platform, the other would lead the way across the bridge, and then the other would pick which slide they should go down. They even got me involved and down the slides!

Today, they took turns with each half of the day. This morning, Thomas was the leader. We went to the Children's Museum with my friend Bonnie and her daughter, Rowyn. While playing at the water table, Veronica followed Thomas very closely around every curve of the table. Playing in his shadow and imitating him.



This afternoon, Judson and the twins surprised me while I was watering all the Easter flowers at church. I met up with them at the church courtyard afterward where Veronica was making very specific patterns in the way she pushed a stroller around the flagpole. Thomas followed her lead... to the T (as only Thomas can!).

Each of these moments of imitation seems to lead to more interactive play and conversation between them - and us.

Great friends... playing together.

Twinning Over Some New Friends

Today we had the fortune of being invited for a play date by another mom of twins (and a newborn singleton!). Reagan and Claire are about 3 months younger than Veronica and Thomas. I've met Amanda through twins club, but more recently through MOPS. She invited us, Jennifer, Henry and Eleanor over too. The unfortunate part of the day was that Henry and Eleanor were sick, so we didn't get to play with them. Veronica and Thomas had not "formally" played with Claire and Reagan yet. (They may have seen them in the Moppette room.) They hit it off like old pals. The boys followed each other around throwing Play-Doh balls and the girls took turns pushing each other on the swing. All four of them found reasons to crack themselves up. I see more of these play dates in our future!

A Well-Balanced Weekend

It was a great and well-balanced weekend: time with the kids friends, girl's night, awesome family time, and extended family time.

Speaking of balance, we'll start with Friday's visit to Gymnastics Unlimited.

It was Robert's third birthday and we were lucky enough to spend it introducing him to the gym - and then get a special sundae with lunch afterward.



Our friends Henry and Eleanor were there as well - the four twins got a game going of running up and down the trampoline walk.

Deanna's birthday was Saturday so she had a "Chocolate Fountain of Youth" party - complete with a chocolate fountain; make-overs; trivia, food, and prizes from our youth; and a group of fun gals.

Saturday was a fun family day including just playtime with the four of us. Judson sent me out to celebrate Deanna's birthday with her in the evening and I returned to find Veronica snuggling Baby Amy.

On Sunday we all slept in - yippee!- and had a good church experience followed by more family time outdoors. Then I headed to watch my Aunt Peggy get installed as an oblate with the Benedictine Sisters.

Mom was there too, and the two sisters headed to our house to visit with the kids after the service.

We had a rockin' good time...

Samuel

And it came to pass, when the time was come about, that Hannah conceived, and bore a son; and she called him Samuel: "because I have asked him of the Lord." -1Samuel 1:20

A dear friend of mine, who has also struggled with infertility, gave birth to a son a week ago today. He was 20 weeks gestation. They named him Samuel for the verse above.

My heart is heavy for them.

Those of you who read this blog, please pray for this family: mother, father, three-year-old sister, and an aunt who recently lost a child as well.

Julianne & David, please welcome your new playmate, Samuel.

Random

eating pickles & cole slaw

• The other day, I heard Veronica talking to Thomas: "Two milks and a water. OK." She then tucked a pad of paper in her pants and walked off... to take my order. A good little waitress - too bad she only serves milk.
  
• Thomas now needs to jump into any puddle he sees.
• Veronica is quite a mother to her baby, Amy. She bathes her, changes her diapers - you can even hear her talk Amy through it all - especially the baths, "It's ok, I've got you," as she pours water over her head.
• Thomas stops to watch ants for long periods of time - he's quite taken with them.
• Veronica feeds Amy in her little high chair a lot now. Judson saw her take Amy's plate and scrape food into the play sink after dinner one day.
• Thomas can now sing a variety of our playlists now. He not only does Mary Poppins, but also Laura Bergman, Hap Palmer, and any song from a Blue's Clues show.
• Veronica likes to take a bag with her most places now.
• Thomas is into digging in the flower bed. He likes to move the dirt... to the driveway.
• Veronica wants desperately for Thomas to be her baby. She wants to change his diaper and get him out of his car seat. She serves him whatever she can reach on the table when he needs more food. She even insists that she should carry him at times.
• Thomas likes to swing with his eyes closed.
• Veronica's common phrase now: "This is pretty heavy!"
• Thomas's common phrase now: "Go away!" (most often when he's playing - most likely when it's something he knows he shouldn't be doing)
• Instead of napping, I often hear duets being sung over the baby monitor. This repertoire includes Happy Birthday; Twinkle, Twinkle; and Let's Go Fly a Kite.

Half A Dozen

Amy is very pregnant and quite uncomfortable - yet she is still super-mom. I have been offering to watch the girls for a lot of this pregnancy. She finally took me up on it for today. Before today came, however, Carolyn needed her kids watched so she could get her car worked on. OK, I thought - that's doable. Then, Katie had a work meeting... Fortunately, she was able to take Cecilia to the meeting, so that gave us one more playmate. Six kids: 1 - 5 year-old, 4 - 2 year-olds, and a 2 month old. The day went quite smoothly - including a snack and lunch! They all got along splendidly - and Julia was even quite the helper for clean-up - initiating it herself. (I should have her over on a regular basis!)

Haiku

We made it to the cemetery as well for Mother's Day. I spent a long time just sitting on the grass, staring at the little lambs on the headstone. As we got up to leave, a pair of robins played in the tall grass near us. They were far enough away that their heads would come in and out of view in the grass. We both watched them for a long time, as if they were Julianne and David themselves. We knew we couldn't run to them as they were not to be held by us - only to be viewed with small glimpses.

I can't remember how to write a haiku properly, but this is my attempt at trying. A haiku for a mother of angels:

a pair of small birds
frolic out of reach nearby
we move and they're gone

Mother's Day Weekend

We'll start the Mother's Day weekend recap with Friday. Chloe, Debi, and Deanna came for a visit. Because we hadn't seen Chloe since her 4th birthday, we celebrated it on our own. We had a gift and a cake. I didn't realize I didn't have candles until I was getting ready to serve the cake, so we had a little math lesson before we presented her a cake with two number 2 candles on it.

After lunch, we had some craft time. I had bought some flower pots to make Mother's Day gifts with. My intent was to put the kids hand prints on them with a cute little verse about hand-made or hand grown or something. However, I painted Thomas's hand 5 times (and cleaned the pot 5 times) before I gave up because they didn't look like hands with each print - and because they were itching to paint. Veronica followed Chloe's lead and worked on the rim of the pot first. Thomas, however, decided painting his hand was much, much cooler - so that's what he did. Occasionally, he would hold his hand out for me so I could spin the pot around in his hand so we could say it was "hand-painted!"


Saturday we headed south. Grandma & Pa watched the kids while we went to Madison Shawe to see their production of Les Miserables. My cousin Harlan did a fantastic job as Marius. It was an amazing performance for a small school who used most of their 7-12th grade student body to pull it off in the gymnasium. I almost forgot I was in the gym - except that my backside wasn't too happy with the metal seats.

Sunday we went to church with Mama and Daddy Gayle. The church was almost more packed than I've seen it on Christmas. Following the service we headed to their home to visit before meeting up with Gayla, Dave, Jason, & Vera at the Pines. We sat in the very back of the establishment, so every time someone left for the buffet, it was like they disappeared. "Where'd (fill in the blank) go?" Veronica would ask every time.

As Danny and Dawn had made it to North Vernon, we decided to stop off back at Grandma & Pa's on our way home. Thomas got a lesson it "tee" ball from a guy with a flower behind his ear. Danny also played the role of exterminator by offing a few carpenter bees with a tennis racket.

And the day couldn't be complete without ganging up on Pa...