'Tis the Season

Tonight the twins and I went to a Advent preparation party at school. The emcee was reading a story about Advent and trust. She {reciprocally} asked the kids, "Even when you don't understand, your parents know what they are doing, right?" Thomas, sitting right next to the story-teller, replied, "Kind of... but not really."

Later, while the families were wrapping up their homemade advent wreaths, Veronica wanted more pizza. While I was in the back of the room attending to her, I heard the emcee ask for anyone to come up and share their Advent traditions. Next thing I heard was Thomas's voice (back up front at the microphone), "I love my mommy and my daddy and my family... and Halloween."

Preemies

In our family of 6, we are 6 for 6 on premature births. Did you know that 1 in 8 babies are born prematurely? That premature birth is the number 1 killer of newborns? That premature babies cost ten times more than healthy babies? Today is National Prematurity Awareness Day... just so you know.

This blog is full of posts, mainly about two preemie miracles who keep us smiling and on the move. Our other preemie miracles are no less part of our smiles, yet their absence from this earth makes it hard to move some days.

Both sets of miracles keep our hearts full and our family strong.

I'm thankful to all who struggle to fight the hardships of prematurity. I do not regret the long, hard battles I've fought to have my special, unique family of preemies. I love all my preemies!

My Guardian Dears

About a month ago, we were doing some simple math at the dinner table. I asked how many kids were at the table. Veronica answered, "Four. One (pointed to Thomas), Two (to herself), three, four (two points to the sky)."

Then, last week out of the blue, Veronica and Thomas increased their questioning and talking about Julianne and David. It started with Veronica asking, "Mommy, when can Julianne come down so I can show her something?" I explained how Julianne and David are ALWAYS watching them, how they are so proud of them and how much fun they think they are. Thomas held up the Play-Doh sculpture he was creating and said, "I made this so David could see it!" That started a week of making pictures, singing songs, doing all sorts of things for Julianne and David.

I must say, they are incredibly intuitive – and compassionate. On Sunday, at church, a song which was played which we had picked to be played at Julianne and David's funeral. It had me in tears. As I held Veronica, she would just lean back, smile at me with wise, knowing eyes, hug me tight and repeat it all. Thomas, who was snuggled up to Judson leaned over a few times to kiss me. No questions about why I was crying. No worrying about what had me upset. Just plain, simple, compassion.

When I explained that Julianne and David's birthday was coming up, both Thomas and Veronica were quite excited. Somehow Veronica even knew "they'll be five!" Thomas helped me make cupcakes yesterday, and Veronica decorated them with sprinkles. They even wanted to take them to school today to share with their classmates for Julianne and David's birthday. School was cancelled however, due to a water main break.

We headed south for the day. We were able to spend an hour or so with Aunt Rosie who's head will have a similar scar to Veronica and Thomas's. We shared some birthday cupcakes with Rosie, Paul, Allie, Natalie and Lola, and headed south.

It could not have been a more beautiful day in November. It was well into the 70s with blue skies and plenty of sunshine. On the way to the cemetery Thomas and Veronica worked diligently on artwork for Julianne and David.

They asked a lot of questions on that 30 minute car ride from Madison.

"Why do they live in Heaven?"

"When will we see them?"

"Are they still little?"

When we arrived at the cemetery, they hopped out, not missing a beat, gleefully chasing one another. The sound of a little boy and a little girl laughing in the sunshine. Music to my ears. Like a chorus from Heaven.

We pulled out the cupcakes made with so much love, placed the candles in them and sang "Happy Birthday." Veronica and Thomas were quite happy to step in and blow the candles out.

We attached the custom artwork to a pink and blue balloon. Before letting the balloons go, I asked if we should say a prayer, thinking I'd just do something impromptu. Veronica started right in with the perfect prayer…

Angel of God, my Guardian Dear

To Whom God's Love commits me here.
Ever this night, be at my side
To light and guard, to rule and guide.
Good night, Julianne.
Good night, David.
We love you!

The four of us let the balloons go. "Bye, bye balloons! Have a good trip to Heaven. Enjoy the pictures, Julianne and David!" said Thomas.

We watched as the four balloons raised up to the heavens, not straying from one another. Judson pointed out that "Mommy's balloon is leading them all." Judson's balloon took up the rear, making sure we all stayed together.

Veronica and Thomas said many things. Poignant things we were certain we wouldn't forget. As I try to write this, I cannot remember all the amazing things they said. Things that helped to make this one of the best birthday celebrations yet.

It was a gorgeous day to celebrate our special family.