She looked me in the eye, and simply said, “No, [classmate] can still talk to him.” She was mistaken – it was her classmate’s grandfather. However, her perception of it made me catch my breath.
The other day, Thomas ran out into a parking lot. I sat him down to have a serious discussion with him. I hadn’t ever brought up death before, but just getting hurt didn’t seem to make an impact on him. So, I said, “but you could die!”
He looked at me and calmly said, “I want to go to Heaven to see my brother.”
I am amazed at their acceptance of death. It is truly a faith-driven peace. Of course they don’t know yet the heartache of losing someone they love. They only know the joy their brother and sister must have living in Heaven with Jesus. Living a life of love and watching over those they love. Together.
This last interaction with Thomas terrified me, of course. We have glorified Julianne and David’s existence in Heaven. After all, isn’t that our goal – to obtain eternal life with those we love, with our Lord? We want them to know their brother and sister and not be sad about it. However, I don’t want to make Heaven a goal before their time… I explained further to both of them that Heaven is where we want to be, but not before God wants us to be there. We won’t all go at the same time and although I’m happy Julianne and David get to live in Heaven where we will someday join them, I do get sad that I can’t hold them. I would be sad if I couldn’t hold Thomas and Veronica. They seemed to understand this. (And, I admit that I reverted to the, “If you get hit by a car you may not die. You could be hurt very badly and have to be in a hospital for a long time.” – This seemed to work too.)
I do try to dwell on their amazing acceptance of faith, family and Heaven. I am amazed at how proud Thomas is to have a brother. How Veronica feels special that she has a sister and TWO brothers. Thomas has even been able to deal with some new separation issues by knowing he can talk to his brother in his heart. Veronica feels she is not alone because her sister can see her. One night, Thomas told me he would be alright because his brother would rub his back.
These two can tell you the story of Good Friday through Easter. They can tell how how horrible it must have been for Jesus to be nailed to a cross. I had tried to share as little as possible about what was going on, but they kept asking. And, they wanted to hear the answers. They accept the answers. They are also excited to tell the story of Easter day (and why the Easter Bunny decides to celebrate).
At Christmas, Veronica and Thomas were happy that Julianne and David were able to be at Jesus’s birthday party with Him. They seem to be happy to know that their sibling get to participate in another exciting celebration in their own way. They are excited to share with these people they don’t even know… but yet they do.
I have never seen God, but I know Him. He talks to me in many ways. He speaks to me even louder when he shows me how Veronica and Thomas can reach for something unseen, grasp it, love it, hold onto it and want to understand it daily.
He said to them, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” And he took the children in his arms, placed his hands on them and blessed them. ~ Mark 10:14-16
I have lost two children. Two children have made the realization of being a family with four children possible. Their faith makes my faith grow stronger. Our faith keeps our family strong.
As we approach Easter, I am so thankful to know that we are given life beyond this one. As rich as this life can be, it’s a life that will only be richer – shared with all those we love and without the hurt of this world.
***********************************************
Postscript and invitation:
At the same time, I am reminded at those who love this special family we have. Those who have supported us through our ups and downs. Those who love our family in it’s entirety. It really is overwhelming. I’m excited to celebrate this the week after Easter through the March for Babies. A cause where God has given us people who use their resources and knowledge to work toward giving families chances. I walk for all babies. You can join me here: http://www.marchforbabies.org/kring
No comments:
Post a Comment